Blarg, I feel like venting, since this is Jaime and I's venting community. Just for us, that no one else watches. Ha, funny stuff.
I leave for college on Monday -- crazy stuff. My mom has wigged out on me -- bad stuff. Hurricanes are scary, and I can understand if someone worries, but I always call her when I leave to go somewhere and yet I wake up to a phone call at my friend Jason's apartment from my mom freaking out because "she didn't know where I was" Not onnly had I been at his house for the past three days, she expected me to call, while we were hit with the hurricane because her area had all ready been hit. I'm just so sick and tired of my mom breaking down my neck. People tell me it's this twisted bird-leaving-the-nest syndrome all parents go through but this is not how I wanted to spend my last couple of days with my mom. Waking up to her bitching me out like a mofo.
I've been counting down the days till I move, which is sad. I just want to have freedom. I know she's looking out for me, and I respect every last bit of it, but lately it's totally getting on my nerves, which makes me want to move out faster, which sounds horrible. I'm leaving my family, and she's making me want to leave. She has these horrid mood swings ( which i think is early signs of menopause ) and it's I can never make her happy. She told her friend that I don't think about her or am considerate to her needs. I feel a 'every-parent-does-that' comment coming along. She told her friend that all i think about is myself and my friends and never about her or anything. Yet I stop by her work all the time to bring her food when she doesn't have lunch, or something I found in the mall I pick up because i thought she might like. yet I'm not considerate of her.
Well my excuse .. I leave for college, I move out on my own two and a half hours away. It's scary. And she tells me that she can't wait till I'm gone because then I'll learn to appreciate her more. I do appreciate her, just she doesn't cook, clean or anything anymore for me. I think I'm ready to do this 'by myself' thing, but I want to still be dependent. But lately, I just want her our of my hair.
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